


No Limit of Longing

by LightOfTheLucii



Category: Tales of Graces
Genre: M/M, Richard has angst, set after the future arc
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-09
Updated: 2015-05-09
Packaged: 2018-03-29 18:33:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3906439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LightOfTheLucii/pseuds/LightOfTheLucii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It isn't enough, and yet Richard feels he doesn't even deserve that much.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Limit of Longing

It isn't enough. Just not enough.

But it's more than he should take.

Asbel isn't his, not really. Asbel is expected to marry Cheria, not him. He and Asbel have no future together. They can't have biological children together, and as much as Richard loves Sophie, she isn't his child. She's already heir to Lhant in a way and it wouldn't be fair to Sophie to place the burden of the whole of Windor on her shoulders. And people would talk. Use it against him. He's popular, both in Windor and abroad. But how many of those same people would be happy to know the truth? Very few know the exact truth of his involvement in the Lambda incident, and those that did all forgave him. This is a crime far beyond even that.

The courtiers throw their daughters at him and he doesn't complain. He understands. It's part of the game, as much as he hates the rules. He has to take a wife, someday. Children. Guarantee the continuation of Windor's peace. None of the young ladies can hold a candle to Asbel.

Dear, selfless, clueless Asbel.

Asbel who gave him everything and earns mismatched eyes for his trouble. Asbel who blushes furiously when Richard, lonely and slightly tipsy, confessed his feelings. Dear, dear Asbel. Who tentatively kisses him back and is there later to help him to bed when he passes out.

They can't see each other too often; the forced separation only makes the fire burn fiercer.

Each time is the same. Each time is hurried, snatched moments of privacy before one or the other has to rush off. The only thing better than Asbel is Asbel pressed against him, whimpering and trembling, clutching him urgently. They don't dare go any further than a hasty heated session in empty rooms when they can find them, and it isn't enough. But Asbel has his own responsibilities, and Richard can see the guilt Asbel feels if he believes he is shirking from them, his father's death lurking in his thoughts. Lhant needs him, and Richard knows Lady Kerri wants her eldest to marry. And soon. Cheria is the obvious choice, and it feels like a betrayal. She deserves better.

It doesn't stop either of them from whispering hushed arrangements for next time though. _Forever_ , Asbel says earnestly. He'll be Richard's forever. He swore to be Richard's sword, didn't he? Marriage can't, won't change that. Richard merely nods, wishing it was so easy. But for the moment they can fool themselves, and he pulls Asbel close once more, urgently, burying his face in Asbel's shoulder to hide the tears.

Soon the dreaded day arrives, and Asbel doesn't have the heart to stop it. He needs a wife, Lhant needs a future Lord and Sophie needs someone after they are all gone. It is for the best.

Apart from Richard's broken heart.

It wasn't enough.  He could've done something, anything, but he doesn't.  Perhaps this is the punishment he deserves.


End file.
